How do you know if you have ever been in love? Most people would argue that although being in love with someone is non-tangible, there's definitely no doubt in their mind of it existing. In fact, if you are questioning whether or not you're in love, then you are most definitely not.
For me, falling in love with an individual is really a decision made based on the successful matching of one's own predetermined criteria or preferences.
I fondly refer to the beginning stage of partner selection as the 'terminator glasses' phase, since it filters through a potential mate's attributes and matches them off against our own one of a kind preferences.
On the New Years Eve just passed, I went to meet good friends at a bar where we would be enjoying the evening. There, waiting at the door with my friend, I saw him for the first time. I did a rapid terminator scan:
Height: Around 6 foot. Match.
Build: Not too skinny, not too fat, not too buff. Match.
Hairstyle: Short dark brown. Not an over the top David Beckham. Match.
Complexion: Dark olive. Match.
Lips: Plump. Match.
Smile: Hot. Match.
Eyes: Big, brown, expressive, with lengthy thick lashes. Match!
Stance: Gentle, not cocky. Match.
Nationality: Clearly foreign, probably Brazilian. Match.
Using the terminator glasses still firmly planted on my face, the confirmed Brazilian was permitted to move onto the second part of phase one: interaction.
This really is often the most fatal portion of any prospective relationship, since each and every sentence uttered, every look given, and every movement is put through the filtration system of the terminator glasses. Any miss-match could lead to premature relationship death.
Stage two, 'the rose colored glasses' phase, is very dangerous and not commonly approached with caution by either candidate. Depending on the impact of stage one, bombs warning 'relationship doom' may very well be dropped right in front of one's eyes, yet become dismissed un-noticed.
Declaring the title of stage three is challenging. And the truth is, I don't know what to call it simply because I'm usually making my way to the green exit sign above the fire escape before you can say 'marry me'.
My encounter with stage three is that I usually realize Mr. Perfect is human. I refrain from accepting him just the way he is, and try and point out where he is lacking.
People claim at this point that they've 'fallen out of love'. My argument is that they were never ever in love in the first place.
What if I said that true love could only be unconditional? And inside of that, true love can only mean 100% acceptance of the person, just the way they are and just the way they are not. What if love, real love, is just loving?
So, if you're single and on the prowl once more, approach pretty women knowing what you are getting yourself into. Have no regrets approaching women and enjoy the ride. Eventually as you approach women you will start your journey to locating the unconditional love that you simply deserve.
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